Monday, November 2, 2009
Motordome Not Exploded!
False report from our field reporters. We pay them in beer and vanilla flavored malt liquor. Sometimes they get their facts wrong. Waaaaayy WRONG!
What really happened was that four roadworthy team members(Griz, Bobby, Hazel, and I) crawled into a can on wheels to head to a safe and fireball free weekend of racing, drinking, fake racing, and booing and cheering. There were sexy robots, questionably sexy Borats, Sloth!, a branch clearing giraffe on a tall bike, a bull chasing some runners, a girl wearing a shower, some idiot with a skateboard through his chest(uh, me), lots of speedos and bikinis, okay almost too many, PeeWee Herman, leprechaun, Oompah Loompah, Super Mario and Luigi and Toadstool, as well as dragons, and multiple costume failures-like the guy with the trident. Just sayin'.
The human six pack of barriers was pretty dope, and chased a few people down to make them dismount again or face possible DQ, or lots of booing. There was a ton of booing. There were a few handfuls of spandors at each race who either did not dress up or just put on a wig and called it good. Booooo!!!!! Beer and water and snacks were flying at these monsters, who saw it fit to poach the course of merry making, and fun having to, you know, get all serious and score some points in the serious. But these guys just didn't get the memo that this was NOT a race.
Hopefully enough trauma was caused by the barriers/gauntlet of shame area that this will not happen again. We were in good company over by Team Beer, Super Relax and Grundel Bruisers and the sun was out for the crowd to enjoy. Sure I didn't get to see bicycles filled willy nilly with explosives lit on fire and ridden around a hapless throng of drunk bastards, which would rule, but I got a welcome change of pace and survived my race without breaking ribs. I got to fall asleep in the granny attic with Griz and Bobby in what would have been one of the best photos of the weekend. But I have memories and those are pretty good.
Next week is SSCXWC at PIR and we will be seeing one of the largest fields all season with a field limit of 230. Gotta get it together and get in shape for lots of drinking beer and enjoying ourselves, and maybe even some good racing.